311: Job Systems for a Cleaner and Happier Home
Welcome to the Joyful Mom Podcast!
I’ve been chatting recently with my mom friends about chores and jobs for kids. So I thought I would talk about it here on the podcast, to give you some ideas if you are kinda feeling stuck or like you need some new energy with chores for your kids, or systems for your family. I will share what I’ve been doing for years. Obviously there are a million ways to do this, and it seems like everyone has to find their own system that works for them. However, I want to share this way of doing things, just as an idea, or a place to start.
First of all, before we even dive into that, let’s talk about why do you do this. Why would you have chores and jobs for your kids? Well, one reason is so you aren’t doing everything yourself. It’s exhausting to take care of everything and everyone's needs all the time, and as your kids get older, they can help out, so you don’t do all the work and you can have time to do other fun things with them. Another reason is that they learn life skills that they will need in their future. I didn’t grow up learning life skills…my one job was vacuuming the floor. I was very spoiled and my mom took care of everything. So my childhood was great, but when I got married, I found I had very little life skills- cooking, cleaning, organizing…they most certainly don’t come naturally to me at all, and I’ve had to learn them throughout my life. So I firmly believe in teaching my kids how to do things like life skills so they can be self-sufficient and take care of themselves as an adult.
I’ve found that it takes more time as they are little to teach them, and it can be kind of exhausting. They don’t do as good of a job as you would like, plus you have to teach them, it’s usually quicker and easier to do it yourself, but if you’re doing everything yourself it’s not quicker and easier.
It is kind of like the hockey stick effect and graph. Where you are putting in the effort and work in teaching them it feels like forever, and you wonder if they will ever be able to do it without you guiding or helping them. And suddenly, you don’t have to do anything and it’s done. So that’s another reason to take the time and effort to give your kids chores and jobs and teach them how to help out around the house. They, at some point, do a really good job, without you needing to say anything, and suddenly your workload is way way lighter.
This isn’t related to cleaning and chores, maybe it is kinda, because making bread could be a chore, but one of my children has learned how to make bread, and he can make bread start to finish without me doing a thing. It’s amazing. I can’t believe someone else in the house can make bread without me sitting by them, reading the recipe, checking in with ingredients, nope. I don’t have to do anything, and it’s glorious.
Okay- before I dive in, if you have a hard time giving your kids chores to do because you have a standard of cleanliness that you like and it’s hard to let go of that, and your kids don’t clean to that standard, I’ll try to give a few tips. I get it, because one of my kids vacuuming means my floor is constantly dirty no matter how many times they vacuum, or I show them spots they missed. Sometimes I do have to do a whole floor just so I can feel like my floor is finally clean.
So some of you might have a harder time with that than others, or than me. I have certainly let go of a lot in my house not only because I have so much else going on, but also because I see different tasks as not my job, I’ll explain this more.
So here’s how chores work in our household. My 12 year old down to my 3 year old gets chores. The younger kids get easier chores, and the older kids get harder chores, but I do think kids can do way more than you probably give them credit for. So I write everyone's name down on a piece of paper, and they each get to pick one job they want to do, and then I give them one job I want them to do. So they all have 2 jobs. They are completely responsible for this job every day for one month.
So some examples on our jobs list are bathrooms, counters and table, loading the dishwasher, unloading the dishwasher, vacuuming the floor, cleaning the living room, those kinds of things. The reason I do this for one month is I think it gives them a chance to learn the job really well, and to get good at it. And then they are responsible for something. If dishes need to be done, whoever is on dishes does them every time for that month.
Then, when the next month comes, they switch jobs, I usually don’t let them do the same job because I want them to switch it up, and loading the dishwasher is the most loathed job in our house so that rotates out through the kids.
One thing that could be a blessing and a curse with this, I realized this after we were having a conversation with some friends about how they need to have the kitchen clean every single night before going to bed. And I was thinking about it and realized I do not always make sure my kitchen is clean every night before going to bed. Do I love a clean kitchen? Yes, but it doesn’t bother me if it’s messy going to bed. And I was wondering why, but I think here’s why. Is because when these jobs are tasked to specific kids, it doesn’t bother me because it’s not my job. Yes if it’s piling up I do get bothered, but I don’t usually take care of it, I tell whoevers job it is to come take care of it. But if there’s dishes in the sink, I don’t need to do them, because they will get done tomorrow by whoevers job it is. If there’s stuff on the counter, the person who is on counters can clean it up in the morning.
So I think that’s why it doesn’t bother me too much and why it’s a blessing because I am not stressed about cleaning or needing to stay awake to do all the things, but a curse, because my house probably isn’t in tip top shape maybe like yours might be. It’s still clean, but I’m sure it's far from yours!
This also actually works for me because we homeschool our kids. So my kids are always home. I can tell them to come do their job if it needs to be done at any time. So I’m not waiting all day long for my kids to get home from school to help out. But with them being home all the time, there’s also a constant mess being made!
I do not have a job list for myself, as I fill in everywhere else, and help out with kids as needed, and there is plenty for me to do that’s not being taken care of by the kids. But I do know some people who put their name down and then give themselves jobs, just so their kids can see that mom is working too. Because sometimes kids don’t even realize how much mom is doing, and if they don’t see you on the job chart they might think they do everything and you do nothing. So that’s definitely an option and maybe I should do that, I just haven’t. I also haven’t had my husband on a job list, he takes care of other things, though when he was home more he had a few things that he always took care of. Now his schedule is just not consistent enough or he’s not home enough to even have things on a daily basis that he takes care of. So hopefully in the future we can change that a bit.
So- there you have it. That’s how our job system works. It’s worked really well for me. We’ve been doing it for years now, and I haven’t changed it. I have not been a very consistent person in my life.I'm learning for some things, but this job system for some reason has stuck for me. It’s worked for me, and worked for my kids. Every day, they know what to do, their jobs, and their school, and they can get their job done before I even say anything if they want.
I’m curious, do you use a job system? Are you going to try this? Are you going to have your kids help out more in your home? I’d love to know! Message me at megan_hillukka on Instagram. And even better, if you screenshot a picture of this episode, and share to your stories, and tag me in your stories, I’ll send you a little gift in your inbox!
Take care my friends, see you next week!
If you want to learn more about how you can clear anxiety more automatically by rewiring how the mind is working and processing things, go to my website www.meganhillukka.com where you can click on a link to register for my free training, where I will show you what you need in order to do this.
